With a few trips to the electronics store, and a little trial and error, me and mine (well, mostly the "mine", to tell the truth) have figured out how to make and upload videos.   I'm kinda liking how it turned out.

Although I'm a bit of an introvert by nature, and being in front of the camera is not on my top 10 list of things to do, it's my goal to get more comfortable with it, and to challenge myself in the endeavor.  A lot of our clients are quite apprehensive about the whole counselling thing, and may avoid it.  They don't avoid it because they don't have the money, or the time, or the need--but because it makes them uncomfortable and they dread doing something new that they have never done before.  They worry they might not do it right, or might be laughed at, or might freeze up or...or...or.... So, I figure it's not fair for me to expect clients to do anything in coming to session that I wouldn't do myself...so I pushed myself to try this video thing.

It really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, and....I did it! (with a LOT of help.  Thanx, A!)

The iPads have arrived...and with it, our official launch of feedback enhanced therapy. They are so much fun to use, and learning how to use them has been a breeze...here is Jen Tan, one of our therapists, trying one out:


I got a call from Dr. Eric Kuelker, a psychologist with Mental Health Pros, last fall.  He called to tell me about a   the largest mental health portal on the web.  In addition to allowing clients full access to written information, video and audio seminars, mental health inventories, and the like, it also allows clients access to a secure and private electronic journal for them to organize their thoughts prior to a session.  This journal can be for a client's own use, or the client can allow the therapist to see it prior to the session to allow the session to be focused on the target at the launch of a session.

The most significant factor of Mental Health Pros is that it allows therapists to check in with therapists to see how they are doing, and how they are perceiving therapy.  Our new iPads allow the therapist and client to use less than a minute at the beginning and end of each session to do a "check".  The research speaks to the incredible ability of this to allow the therapist to adjust and tweak the approach to maximize the effectiveness of therapy for each client.

No two people are alike.  If you have more than one child,  you know that what works for one child, and is generally recognized to be an effective strategy for parenting, may not work for the other child.  One infant may want to be held upright, another held tight on his belly, or loosely on her back.  One student benefits from written instructions, another by talking themselves throught it; one by repetition, another by creative problem solving.  One employee benefits from watching others for a while, another learns best by jumping right in and learning by experience.  Different strategies have varying degrees of effectiveness because we're all different. And because we're all different, what works for each person in counselling is also different.

Therapists have long recognized this, and seek to work with each client, adjusting their approach.  However, historically, we've done this haphazardly, by working to "read" our clients' preferences without overt discussion, and sometimes in the intense work of counselling, it can be overlooked.

At Bergen and Associates, we take research seriously, and the evidence is solid.  We need to take a look at how clients are perceiving the effectiveness of therapy, and how well the therapist is working with them.  The evidence is clear, has been replicated in repeated double blind studies (the "gold standard" for research):

• Improvement in a person's functioning is greater when close attention is paid to how well the client feels the therapy is progressing.  This was measured by therapists dividing their caseloads in half...one half were asked for verbal feedback as per usual, and one half completed the objective outcomes. The clients that provided objective feedback had on average, double the amount of positive change, than those who did not.
  
• When therapists use outcome measures with couples, they report a greater sense of happiness in their marriage than when it is not used.  This sense of greater marital satisfaction continues to hold 8 months after therapy has ended.
• Researchers looked at the separation rate of couples...what difference did objectively measuring feedback make? When therapists got regular objective feedback from each spouse during therapy versus the control group who did not get this feedback, it was significantly different.  The number of couples who had separated in the six months after therapy was cut in half when they were in the group who were able to increase the effectiveness of therapy with objective feedback.

Dr. Kuelker didn't have to convince me on the importance of getting a good working alliance with my clients.  I teach students at the University of Manitoba, and I spend time each year with them, showing the evidence that says that this is the single most important factor to a successful outcome.  What I was a little skeptical about was how much difference such brief objective measures could make to the outcome of therapy.  I needed to see for myself...and so I tried this system out for myself.

I have been using this system for the last 10 months or so.  I have become convinced that this has made me a better therapist, allowed me to work more effectively with each client, and has allowed clients that I work with to be able to move more effectively into their future. It creates possibilities for more effective conversations.  It allows clients to let me know how we can make adjustments so that sessions work better. It aknowledges that clients have an important role in helping establish the rhythm and style of the session.  It recognizes that each individual and couple will have a slightly different preferred way of doing therapy--and it allows the client to help shape what that looks like.

I am aware that clients invest significant resources and are willing to risk becoming very vulnerable with us--we have a HUGE obligation to provide the very best experience and outcome possible for each client.

I take this seriously, and we are now set up to have each new client be enrolled in the Mental Health Pros system, with all of its advantages.

All of the therapists are now using this system with new clients. It's a new era for Bergen and Associates.  The recent release of the iPad is great timing for us (well, except the loooong wait for these little delights to arrive--they were on serious back order--but they finally came last week)...it facilitates the completion of the tools on a system that is easy for all clients to use.  Mental Health Pros is a secure site that holds the information for us, and graphs the results so instantly both client and therapist (and referring physician if the client wishes) can see what difference the therapy is making in a person's life.  If something isn't working, and we can see that, we can very quickly make decisions about how best to proceed.

Of course, if a client prefers to do therapy without this resource, this will certainly be respected.  Our goal is to provide you with the best experience possible...and your input and wishes shape this experience "from the ground up"--if you are not comfortable with this, then please let us know.

I'm excited about this enhanced ability to work even more effectively with clients.

Not long ago, I was finishing up with a client* that I worked with for a few months.  We used the formal objective feedback measures, adjusting and tweaking as we went along.  At the end of our last session, she said, "I feel lighter leaving here now than when I came in, in the beginning.  Really, I feel lighter.  I feel like I got a monkey off my back during the time I was here."  With a sparkling wink, she asked, "Is it OK for me to leave that monkey here?" 

My response:  "Absolutely, leave it here.  We've got a closet specifically for holding monkeys. "

*This client offered permission to use parts of her story in ways that would be helpful to others. 

Yesterday' America's Got Talent show had an act that auditioned for it that caught my ear.  I love a capella singing at the best of times, but this one melted me.

It's not easy to be a military veteran, trying to assimilate back into North American culture after having witness the atrocities of war, after being in an environment of constant danger for months on end, after having to make life and death decisions in a split second, after being apart from all the comforts of home and exposed to conditions of people living in extreme poverty and oppression.  A lot of veterans struggle with aculturating once they get back home...some of them more visibly then others.  New Directions is a homeless shelter in Los Angeles which specifically serves the homeless veteran.

A group of veterans from that organization formed a choir--they have successfully fought back from homelessness.  In response to the question, "What do you hope to achieve by appearing on America’s Got Talent", their spokesperson stated:

We want to let all the other people know, all of the other veterans, especially the active duty armed forces that it’s OK for a warrior to seek help.

This group is inspiring and magical...caught a lump in my throat listening to them, enjoying their music, and celebrating their triumph.

What the experience at "America's Got Talent" means to them is:

What it means to us, is that there was a period of time where you might not wanted to see us coming. But the fact is now…This shows what change can do , and that people can change.

I think their group would agree that it's not only OK for a warrior to seek help, but it's also OK for the self-sufficient business executive to seek help, it's OK for the tough auto-mechanic to seek help, it's OK for the tough-as-nails climb-to-the-top ambitious female lawyer, it's OK for the mother of 3 preschoolers who has trouble finding a moment to herself, and it's OK for all those who-want-help-but-are-concerned-it-will-have-them-seem-weak-or-whiny to seek help.  It's hard to seek help, but if it's OK for warriors, it can be OK for you, too.

If you need help, it's OK to seek it.

I'm a student of the therapy profession.  I love to know what makes an therapist an exceptional one, what a therapist does that is helpful, that gives a person hope, that has the person believing enough after the first session that it feels worthwhile to come back.  Therapy is a risky venture as a person dares to talk about that which is hardest to talk about.  There are a whole lot of reasons NOT to go to therapy.  So, while I wonder what can make the difference to have a person decide to go to therapy in the first place, I wonder even more what has them decide, after the initial meeting, to continue.

I came across this blog entry, written by Darlene Ouimet, chronicling her own journey:

I found fresh hope one day when sitting across from a new therapist talking about the hopelessness that was me; In my intake session I told him that I had the best life, the most wonderful husband, 3 great kids and was living my dream on a big farm/ranch riding my horse, but for some reason I had no reason to live. I thought that my family would be better off without me. I was tired, frustrated and heading for my third serious depression in 5 years. The last two depressions had lasted for almost 2 years each. I was terrified of antidepressants since I’d had a terrible withdrawal experience the last time I had taken them. The only stone left unturned that I knew of was that I had not followed through on the therapy for the dissociated identity disorder that I had been diagnosed with when I was in my mid twenties. I had decided to make one last attempt at dealing with that.
I caught just a glimmer of something different in the methods this therapist was using. He didn’t just listen to me, he reacted to me. He winced when I asked if it “was normal for a mother to put her tongue in her 9 year old daughter’s mouth?” He assured me that this was not “normal” and it was in that moment that I knew this therapy would be different. Not because of what he said though, because he winced. Other therapists had never reacted to that question. It was what I later realized was my “test question” and I was not going to tell absolutely everything if I wasn’t going to get an idea if this stuff was just run of the mill no big deal stuff or if something really wrong had happened to me. I had been raised to believe after all, that my life and my upbringing was better than most.
That glimmer of hope is what kept me going week after week, dumping some of the most difficult stories, and being validated by my therapist who was sometimes moved to tears. He showed his disgust for the things that happened to me. He assured me that it was not my fault, but more importantly than that, he showed me why I thought it was my fault, and then he helped me to see why it was not my fault. This was the beginning of my emerging from broken and into to a life of wholeness and splendid mental health beyond anything I had ever hoped for. (bold mine)

I love that Darlene's therapist was not only a professional, but he was profoundly human.  His transparency and authenticity that showed through let her know that she was a real person to him, and he was going to allow himself to be impacted.  The work they did was "soul to soul" work, and not some formulaic "nod and affirm" approach.  The comments after this blog entry are a dialogue of struggling people sharing their difficulty at finding such a therapist, or the incredible blessing such a therapist had been.

If you've had a bad experience with a therapist, don't throw out the possibility of working through your issues with another human being.  Having a caring companion to walk through the dark shadows of the soul is healing in itself, in addition to the significant possibilities of meaningful work happening.  Do the research, find someone who you've heard good things about, ask questions--dare to allow someone to react to your story in a way that has you look differently at it.

Therapy, or counselling as it is often known is seen by skeptics as something for the weak who don't have the strength for their own problems.  Or for the clueless, who can't think for themselves.  Or for the self-centered who need to hear themselves talk. Or only for women who need to "talk about their problems". 

Counselling is made fun of in the movies, on TV, and in the general media.  It is seen as a frivolous expense available as a luxury for the rich.

In sum, counselling is often judged as ineffective or unnecessary.

I saw a study recently that was entitled:

Therapy is 32 times more cost effective at increasing happiness than money.

That headline had me scratching my head, too.  That seemed far fetched...so I looked it up.

Chris Boyce of the University of Warwick and Alex Wood of the University of Manchester compared large data sets where 1000s of people had reported on their well-being. They then looked at how well-being changed due to therapy compared to getting sudden increases in income, such as through lottery wins or pay rises. They found that a 4 month course of psychological therapy had a large effect on well-being. They then showed that the increase in well-being from an £800 course of therapy was so large that it would take a pay rise of over £25,000 to achieve an equivalent increase in well-being. The research therefore demonstrates that psychological therapy could be 32 times more cost effective at making you happy than simply obtaining more money.

(My understanding is that "an £800 course of therapy" is about 4 months of weekly counselling.  This is a British study, but I would propose that us Canadians would have similar results) 

That's pretty significant. No, make that REALLY significant.

The article continues:

University of Warwick researcher Chris Boyce said:
“We have shown that psychological therapy could be much more cost effective than financial compensation at alleviating psychological distress. This is not only important in courts of law, where huge financial awards are the default way in which pain and suffering are compensated, but has wider implications for public health and well-being.”
“Often the importance of money for improving our well-being and bringing greater happiness is vastly over-valued in our societies. The benefits of having good mental health, on the other hand, are often not fully appreciated and people do not realise the powerful effect that psychological therapy, such as non-directive counselling, can have on improving our well-being.” (bolding mine)

There are people who are not surprised by this statistic.  Many of those people are satisfied clients of Bergen and Associates Counselling or clients of other qualified and competent therapists.  I watch people make significant financial commitments to engage in regular counselling, making tough choices in their budgeting.  They do so willingly because the fresh and innovative ways that therapy allows them to look at their lives, is, quite simply, worth it.

Counselling is not cheap.  No doubt about it.

But of what value is good mental health, a stable marriage, good relationships with your children?  My thought:  Priceless.

You're gonna think my point in this post is self serving.  Umm..guilty as charged.  However, I did not make this stuff up.  While it does promote my profession, this post more importantly promotes well-being through the opportunity for you to consider something with careful thought.

There are times when something works, but isn't a sustainable realistic solution.Think about that. 

One of my favorite questions, which usually gets a good chuckle in therapy, is "So...how's that workin'for ya?"

I was at Costco a few weeks ago, when a Good Samaritan passing by let me know that the passenger side rear tire was low. I don’t go around that side of the car really, and so I really appreciated his noticing and telling me.

Well, he was being polite. It wasn’t just low, I think it was close to flat. I drove slowly and carefully to the Coop gas station close by, and they filled it up for me. They checked to make sure it had the right pressure. Let me know I should check it frequently over the next while in case it had a slow leak…the other tires had normal pressure when we made sure they were OK.

I checked several times over the next few days and it looked OK…for a while. About 5 days later, the pressure had dropped to about a 1/3 of what it should be. Went to another gas station, and filled it up again.

Next day…visibly lower. Looked for a gas station…and well, by now you know the drill. I did the predictable. Filled it up with air. Good to drive. Safe to drive. Good to go.

Except this was getting to be a bit of a pain. I was starting to drive slowly by gas stations to check to see if they had an air machine. My thoughts while driving, even while listening to the news, or singing tunes, or chatting with the person beside me, frequently went to that passenger side tire. Was it low? When had I last checked? Was I being overly pessimistic and concerned? Was I being overly optimistic and had overlooked the sponginess of the tire? I started circling the car every time I got in.

The car was safe to drive, but this was not the way to live. The tire was where it should be—it was full and operational—but the strategy I was using was costly. It increased my vigilance, created hassle as I searched for the tire guage and found a pump. It worked but it wasn’t really working.

How well was it workin' for me?  Not so much.

I took it in to Midas, and the great people there had it fixed in an hour. They found a nail. They patched it.  Done. 

I might have just kept filling the tire with air when it needed it. Would’ve been cheaper financially. Would’ve been more expensive to my mental and physical health—today it’s cold—who wants to be filling tires in this weather! 

By now, you get that this isn’t really about tires.

I work with couples who have been filling the air in the tires of their marriage desperately…trying to make the car move forward safely, but at great personal cost. It’s not easy to address a marital flat tire with bandaids, though I’ve heard stories of people trying…and putting in a ton of effort for not-a-lot of results.

• A husband sees his wife is disgruntled and so starts working hard to bring in more income—take the financial stress off to make her happier. It sorta works…she’s happy when she gets new shoes, or buys the new sofa, but then the disgruntlement returns…

• A wife sees her husband pulling away and is distant. She buys a new negligee, gets a babysitter, and gives him a night he won’t soon forget. He likes it…a lot…but it doesn’t last.

I’ve worked with individuals too, who solve slow leaks in the tires of the lives in ways other than finding the leak. They bump along with a strategy that makes it better for a bit…

• go shopping,

• go on-line to a porn site,

• drink too much,

• or _____________ (filling the blank)

but ultimately leaves them feeling lonely and empty…and back where they started…the tire of life is still flat.

One of the things that has been more gratifiying than anything as a therapist is to work with someone who recognizes that

A) there is a problem, and

B) that the strategies they have used to address the problem aren’t effective, and

C) are looking for creative and original solutions that don’t provide a temporary reprieve from the problem, but actually remove the issue as something that is creating them distress.

To watch a person discover the strategy that is has long term satisfaction is, well, is FUN!! I love my job at those moments. The patch cost $22...the air was free.  In the long run, when I measure my quality of life, the patch was immeasurably cheaper. Sure, that solution costs some in dollars if you’re going to see a therapist, but think of the way a person can relax, and er, stop spinning their tires and get moving (sorry, pun was intended!).

It’s not easy going to a therapist. Sometimes us therapists need to really feel what that is like. Being vulnerable and doing some strange in an unfamiliar environment. That’s a tall order and therapists really need to “get it”.

Last week I finished off the fall teaching with my students at the University of Manitoba. The students read textbooks, listened to lectures, practiced with each other, and generally, made some remarkable progress in learning to listen more effectively, and communicate that improved listening. It’s fun to watch students get excited, and not only realize how these skills will make them better therapists, but change the way they talk to their girlfriends, husbands, kids, and parents. It’s powerful stuff.

These students are in a rigorous course of study…they work hard, with many assignments, and many hours of reading and research. And so much of the learning, while important, is “head knowledge”. The end of stressful term was a good time for a little experiential learning that actually is a whole lotta fun.

We played “Bite the Bag”… (if you are looking for a fun game to play at a family gathering this Christmas, I’m letting you in on a great idea). It’s simple, and deceptively fun…and a profound experience to process.

Take a paper bag (those aren’t easy to find these days…I got mine from the local Chinese take out down the block)—and put in on the floor in the middle of the participants. There are a very few rules…each person takes a turn reaching down to grab the bag with his/her teeth and then stands up. Only the person’s feet are allowed to touch the ground…if anything else touches the ground, the person is “out”. Sounds easy. It is…at first. But when a person has bitten the bag, they rip of where their mouth touched the bag.

Picture that. 

It gets shorter.

And the task gets more challenging as the bag gets shorter.

And shorter.

And shorter.

Until the final round when they attempt to pick up a piece of candy from the flat square of what used to be the bottom of the bag.

It’s a game of balance, flexibility, agility, patience, and strategy. And it’s a total HOOT!

So here these students are leaning way over, their butts high up in the air, carefully trying to balance (while many are experiencing the constraints of denim which challenges their flexibility), doing a game they have never done before while fellow budding therapists are watching them.

There’s tentative looks, silent gazing pleas to me to somehow tell them I’m not serious, or that I’ll let someone “off the hook”.

There’s the awkward pulling down of the shirts as clothing starts to ride up—the wrapping of sweaters around the waist to cover up gaps when bending over. There’s nervous giggles with frequent proclamations of “I don’t think I can do this” (immediately prior to successfully biting the bag).

There’s lots of laughter…it is fun. Their classmates are supportive, and students who are pale with the hours of study, start to color a bit with all the giggling. They tease, encourage, cajole, and toss out ideas. And eventually, even the most reluctant are quite caught up in the energy of the room—and those who predicted early failure are suddenly incredibly committed to go “all the way”. 

At the end, feeling a little exhilarated, we talk about it. And they discuss what they learned:

• It’s hard to do something you’ve never done before, and you don’t know how to do it when someone is watching you.
• It’s not easy to be vulnerable in front of people you’re not used to being vulnerable with.
• “Performing” something new at someone else’s command is intimidating when others are watching you to see how you do it.
• It’s difficult to try hard at something you’ve never done before and you’re worried that you’ll fail when someone is watching.

I ask them to remember this when they see clients on their placements in the new year.

I ask them what else they’ve learned through the game and they tell me:

• Sometimes even when a task seems scary, with support and people who understand the situation, it actually isn’t so bad.
• When you start something off in a way that’s not too hard, and it gradually gets harder, you can actually go a lot farther and be a lot more successful than you might have originally predicted.
• A big part of going farther than one would think is possible is having the support and encouragement of people who make it “safe” to try
• “Risking one’s dignity” isn’t as quite as hard when the people around are supportive
• The method of success is something each person gets to figure out for themselves…there is no “one right way”. People tried out suggested strategies and figured it out for themselves.
• It’s actually quite satisfying to try something new and have some success.

 All of these are lessons I hope these budding therapists take with them as they begin the task of working with clients. 

I suspect that there are some people reading this that sense a need to talk to someone but can’t quite imagine picking up the phone, walking into the counselling office and to start talking. It’s really hard to start counselling. It takes courage. For some, it means bucking stereotypes that have been ingrained—“real men don’t share vulnerably”, “Therapy is for sissies”, “Therapy will just blame your mother”. It’s not hard to come up with barriers that can seem to legitimately justify not seeing a counsellor.

Please know that if you go to see a qualified counsellor (do the research to make sure you've got a qualified one!), s/he will be aware that this is new for you, that you will likely want and need to start off tentatively to feel it out. Please know that as you become more comfortable, it is likely that you will be able to talk more freely about more things in a deeper way than you could anticipate prior. Please know that it feels good to work some things out in your own way, to develop strategies and ways of relating to others that are effective. 

If you are experiencing challenges and someone has suggested counselling and you’re thinking about, “give it a go”. Please know that your therapist will know that this is hard for you, and will honor your efforts. If you’re not convinced…print this out, and show it to them on your first visit…and tell them that you’re swallowing hard, breathing deep and taking the risk—and you need the support to do it.

Adversity brings out the best in many.  One of the privileges of counselling clients is that I regularly have the honor of watching men and women triumph over challenges:

• refusing to let a marriage that is on life support die.  A spouse digs deep and breathes deep and with hesitation and even a healthy dose of skepticism--reaches out and offers the proverbial olive branch
• a woman faces the nightmares that her body remembers, and faces the terror down--and for the first time, it begins to dissipate
• a man dares to look at himself candidly for the first time, looking past the bravado and the anger, daring to see the tender part of him that has been wounded and longs to be cared for tenderly

It is totally delightful to watch a person be terrified, quite doubting their ability to handle "going there"...but with support, encouragement, and carefully watching one's footing on the treacherous path...the person ventures forward.  Totally awesomely cool--when they look and see THEY DID IT! 

And they are stunned by their own strength.  And they are powerful.  And it changes them.  Forever. In good ways.

I like Whitney's way of putting it...and she doesn't sing the song lightly or naively.  She knows the stuff she talks about:

I Didn’t Know My Own Strength

Mackenzie Phillips dropped a bombshell last week that has horrified her family, shocked a lot of people, and given childhood incest survivors an ability to hear their own experience and story through the story of another.  The first minute of so of this tape is particularly powerful:

On the 'Early Show', she said: "I was hoping to help incest survivors and find some redemption and freedom," she said on the "Early Show." "I never expected this huge national dialogue. I never expected the rape and incest network to have a 82 percent rise in hits on their website a 26 percent rise in telephone calls."
Last week on Oprah, she read a portion of her book in which she told her experience of waking up from a blackout to find her father having sex with her.  While she initially labelled it rape, her father was surprised to hear her say that...with him declaring that they were "making love".  The incest lasted 10 years.  Of that time, Mackenzie says:

"It became a consensual relationship over time, and I know that I can't be the only one this has happened to," Mackenzie says. "Nobody's talking about this, and someone needs to put a face on not only nonconsensual incest but consensual incest, because I know it exists."

I'd have to say that I quite agree with the following line:

"What struck me most about Mackenzie Phillips' interview," psychotherapist Robi Ludwig told CBS News "is that she's still protecting her father. By calling incest consensual incest, she's still protecting the person who abused her. ... But you can't say it's consensual, because there's always a power imbalance when it comes to a parent and child."

What is helpful about Mackenzie's story is the her implication that at some point she felt she valued the sexual relationship and joined in with it. In my experience in working with survivors of childhood sexual abuse, perhaps the most shameful and hidden horror of the abuse is that the child at some level was made to feel special by the abuse, and so in part, came to welcome it in a life that was otherwise difficult and lonely.  Other times, during times of repeated sexual abuse, a child's body is awakened to a powerful sexual response--it is degrading to hate the sexual experience and want it to end only to find one's body aroused and wanting more.  It is part of the perpetrator's twisted and sinister strategy to have the child believe that s/he wants it and is an active participant.  The child is made to believe that the abuse is part of the way special love is shown to him/her that makes the abuse something to be seen as a sign of privilege.  As the child, in part, is convinced that s/he is welcoming the abuse (even while another part of the child is silently screaming for it to stop), the child begins to feel like an active accomplice in the abuse.

The act of shameful betrayal--to find some part of body or heart welcoming the sexual contact--is something that sexual abuse and incest survivors struggle with.  It is the unspoken horror--with the survivor's assumption that if others knew of it, the survivor would be known to be as sick and sinister as the perpetrator. The agony of this shame is unspeakable, and therefore, not spoken of.

Mackenzie Phillips opened the door to have people begin to dare to speak...to have a voice...to dare to begin to talk about it...to begin to speak out and heal.  I can only hope that her story continues to impact those who struggle with all of the hidden and secret pain of sexual violation at the hands of those that were meant to protect.

This on a beautiful card I received this week, encapsulating better than I ever could about what Bergen and Associates Counseling is all about.

Our logo has a seed planted in dirt, recognizing that it is at times of being buried by life that one also has opportunities to grow.  The colors on our walls are various shades of green. Our office is full of plants.  The theme of “growth” is everywhere.

At Bergen and Associates Counselling, we are deliberate in creating optimum conditions for that growth…we recognize that people need to feel safe, that there is a sense that the therapist can be trusted.  Sometimes that means encouraging a client to wait with that which is most sensitive until such time as that trust is built.  Other times it involves discussing what happens with sensitive information, how it will be processed or reflected on by the therapist.  We recognize that it takes courage to explore topics which are shameful or painful…and so we honor the risks that are taken, and work with a client to ensure they feel supported as those risks are taken.  We take great care to ensure confidentiality to allow clients to pursue that growth in a safe environment..

	One of the highest privileges is for me as a therapist to witness those growth-sprouts in clients’ lives.  It is not uncommon for acquaintances that I meet to comment that “it must be very difficult to work with people who need counselling”.  I tell them quickly and automatically that it rather is quite the opposite…that walking alongside individuals as they emerge from difficult times in liberating and exciting ways is a truly remarkable feature in my life’s work.
I get to be a change-witness…to watch flowers emerge from seeds…to facilitate that growth, to water it, and to celebrate it.
	I’ve not got a green thumb, but I’ve got a huge soft spot in me for buds of all kinds in spring.  ...then again, I just love watching sprouting in general.